By the way, I'm pregnant!

 

Se zice ca o imagine face mai mult decat 1000 de cuvinte.

I hate Englad

I hate England. I hate the weather here; it always starts to rain whenever you have great plans in the outdoors. It's sunny only during the week-days when you're usually at work and if you're not, then you better schedule your holiday in another country because this English mate, Murphy, has one day decided, for no particular reason at all, to imply Murphy's Law. I hate the stuck up people here – no matter if they're bloody English or just pretending to be, they will all have this contagious microbe I think science now calls arrogance. This makes English people snobs and Indians (I'm sorry, I meant to say English Indians – no, wait… Ahm… brown skinned Englishmen) the most unprofessional I've ever had the unpleasant fluke to meet. Don't even get me started on the Arabs here! The only time you're going to see an Arab smile at you is when he's on the other side of the counter trying to sell you something. I hate their plastic food. In all the time I've been here I have understood that besides the complimentary breakfast of sausage & beans and perhaps porridge, the English lack originality in the kitchen. For them it was easier to just copy what they've seen in other cuisines or import those cuisines with their chefs' altogether. That's why you'll see an Indian restaurant on each street corner and a pizza place on each street. I wanted to order at the hotel restaurant, they gave me a menu to read so I read it: I had to choose between meat or veggie lasagna or chicken tikka masala (whatever that means). I asked for an English dish and the waitress looked at me funny. She said they don’t serve that in there. My god, I'm staying at an English hotel in bloody Birmingham and I'm served 10 types of English black tea each morning at the buffet between sausages and beans, but you don’t have anything sausagey or beany during dinner?! Noooo!!! Most people think of fish & chips as an original English dish. It's English alright, but it's not a dish. It's a snack or an appetizer, not a dish. It's the thing you eat with a beer when you're out of nuts. Silly me, thinking I might hit the jackpot with that! The fish is actually fish fingers and the chips are French fries. So not only was that a bit confusing, but it was also smaller than my stomach. And what's with the attitude towards foreigners altogether?! I mean – they practically invaded India, they fought with the Germans over South Africa and got kicked out of Japan for a while, but they're the ones complaining about too many foreigners invading their country. It's called karma, bitches! And why the hell are you complaining anyways?! Like I've seen any English people driving cabs since I've come here! Every time I need to take a cab to the office and back you'll see this Indian dude with a turban and a… "musky" smell arriving 20-30 min late to pick me up. (I swear, this people do not know the concept of punctuality!) Mostly I hate England because it’s not home.