Trip to Cucuta - Scene II

In this scene the action takes place on the ship going to Cucuta. Like sound-effects - some waves, wind...

Wife: (screaming very upset) Eatel!!! Throw away that mirror! We’re having a good time here!
Father: Oh, yeah! You know, I didn’t know I like poker so much, until now!... and… I’m so lucky!
Wife: (surprised) Oh, you feel lucky, huh? Let’s make a deal! The one who loses throws Eatel abord!
Father: Deal! Done! Shake hands! (sound of dealing cards)
Eatel: Drinka, I’m so hungry, I haven’t eaten for 2 days! Let’s order something. (sounds of empty stomach)
Drinka: I’m just a bit thirsty!
Eatel: Waiter! Hey, you! I’m dying here! (steps coming)
Waiter: Yes, sir.
Eatel: I want… oh, I’m so hungry that I can’t decide. Drinka, what do you think, a cake or a pancake?
Drinka: I don’t know! Trap question. Take a pancake. It has fewer calories.
Waiter: Anything else?
Eatel: She would like a juice or something.
Drinka: Yes! Four bottles of scotch, keep the ice! Two champaignes and the best wisky you’ve got!
Waiter: (flabbergasted) Of…course...
Wife: (extremely happy) Haha! You lost! God, I’m good!
Father: (crying) Oh, what have I done? Eatel, my child!
Eatel: (passively) Not now, dad! I’m eating!
Father: (symphatetic) Eat, my child, eat! (low voice) After all, it’s your last meal…
Wife: (aggresive) Boy! Two coffees!
Father: Without sugar!
Drinka: And one more bottle of whisky!...
Wife: Drinka, for the love of God, I’m not carrying you to your room up those steps again!
Drinka: Noooooooo worries (singing) I want to sleep with the fish tonight!
Father: What’s her problem? And why is she dressed like a nun???
Wife: (low voice) Shhh, don’t remind her! Titi dumped her…
Father: (shocked and loud) What? Why? Why would Titi break up with our beautiful daughter?
Drinka: (bursting and running around the ship): Nooooo, why Titi, why? I’m sorry!!! (crying loudly)
Wife: Hey, where is that coffee?! It’s been 5 minutes! Incompetents!

(opposite part of the stage)

Commander of the ship: Madame, Sir, (bowing his head and smiling) Enjoy the trip!
Wife: (screaming) What’s to enjoy? You’re all incompetents! Each one of you! Oh (appologising), you’re their king, I’m sorry.
Father: She’s right!
Commander of the ship: Please relax! I’ll order coffee for you! On my behalf!
Wife: What a coincidence! That’s what we ordered 10 minutes ago and it seems we’ll get it on the other side!
Commander of the ship: (low voice like talking to himself): I’ll take care you do! (talking to wife) – Excuse me, I have to withdraw! (steps)
Wife: Do that!
Father: Eatel! (running steps)
Eatel: (on command) Yes, dad!
Father: Jump overboard!
Eatel: Yes, dad! (sounds immitating splashing of water)
Father: Good boy.
Wife: That was fast!
Father: Of course! He was always such a good boy! (wiping fast a little teardrop on the corner of his eye)

(opposite part of the stage)

Commander: My dear Butchy, do you see that ugly lady and her big ass husband over there?
Butchy: (oddly resembling to the size and intelligence quotient of an ogre) duh… duh ones who waves to fishiiies?
Commander: Yes. Introduce them to a lifeboat
Butchy: No problem, boss!
Commander: Oh, and take that drunk nun to keep them company!
Butchy: (a silent laugh)